Circles and Community

I’d like to start off with an apology. I try to write blogs every week, and I missed the last one. Between my husband’s birthday, family stuff, and a major case of writer’s block, I couldn’t come up with anything. Trying to come up with a subject can be tricky from time to time. If you enjoy reading this blog, subjects you are interested in me tackling are always appreciated.

Yesterday, I had the pleasure of attending a magical community event led by my friend Stacey Doll. We created a central sacred space, did some yoga, did a little journeying, did a little chanting, and opened up. While I’m super comfortable being opened up to, I have a hard time opening up to others. There’s a certain level of being authentically there with a bunch of people that you don’t know that makes me uncomfortable. Unfortunately for me, I believe this to be an important part of my work. To help others, I have to be able to help myself, check in, and be aware of any issues that may get in the way.

I get in my own way a lot. In fact, that’s what my journey taught me that night. I won’t get into the weird symbolism of my subconscious, but I believe that Spirit was telling me a lot of the obstacles that stop me in my work are me. It’s one of those obvious things that I forget to pay attention to. I can be my worst enemy. Part of my work is finding those parts of me that are no longer useful, and leaving them behind.

One of the interesting connections that pop up in many Shamanic cultures is the dismemberment experience. In initiation, the spirits take apart the shaman to be in their dreams, then make them whole again. It’s representative of the spirits taking away all that you were so you emerge into the world as something entirely new. It’s a scary premise, but apparently an important initiation. It makes sense. As I said, I get in my own way. So, here I am, trying to leave behind the parts of me that get in the way.

What happens if you don’t face your own issues and make peace with them in this work? From what I’ve seen and experienced, one of two things. You slowly get off of the path of the shaman, or your issues start to get a little more aggressive in trying to get your attention.

I think that people sometimes think that this sort of path is all flowers and light. I heartily disagree. If you don’t face your shadows, ignoring them because they’re not pretty, or “high vibration” enough, they tend to come out for you. We can’t do the work with others without expecting to do the work for ourselves.

It’s not a once and done deal, either. I have a good amount of shit that I have to work through still, though happily less than what I started with. That’s part of the learning experience. Through working through your own stuff, you have a beginning blueprint on how to help others. Just a beginning, of course, because everyone has their own unique way of dealing with their blockages and trauma. It’s a start, though, and a point where you can feel compassion more deeply.

Another thing that came up due to this circle is the importance of community. I know I talk about that from time to time, but having a group to do a little magic with felt really good. My teacher has also been encouraging her students to begin creating community. So, I will be planning a few full moon fires when the weather gets warmer. It’d be nice to get out in the moonlight, fire and drums ready to make a little magic. I’ll keep everyone posted about those, as well as workshops that I plan on leading this summer.

I want to leave you all with a thank you. Thank you for being part of my community, for being interested in what I have to write, and being part of trying to make the world a little better. You are all much appreciated.

Until next week

-The Green Mountain Mage